Tuesday, June 03, 2008

every day

Every morning I keep checking the RSS feeds, for something - for some sign, some purpose.

(Not having much luck)

Feel restless in a way - why am I here & what am I doing with my life?

At times I think that it would be easier if I was back in China, but that's a cop-out...I was going through the same thing there.

Restlessness for its own sake is tiring and pointless - especially if you just let it eat at you.

However, I keep thinking that my subconscious is trying to tell me something, and that yes, some purpose is just around the corner if I just take a moment and notice it.

(but yeah, not much luck on that yet)

1 comment:

erinmarie said...

well... at least you don't have the waking world breathing down your neck telling you you're in the wrong place doing the wrong thing.

Past few months I've had at least five people tell me, more than once:

a. "you're in the right field, but the wrong field. Do you understand what i mean?"(positively stated)
b. "This is only a passing thing for you, I can just tell. You are destined for greater things, and you will accomplish them."
c. ooh this is my favorite...like i'm about to die or something...like there is no chance left for me...
"YOU MISSED YOUR CALLING..." ooh that burns, stabs multiple times. f*ck. like it's just easy to go be an artist. f*ck.

or maybe i'm wrong, maybe the world is all up in yur grill too. bah.

I wouldn't mind a sign or two or three myself... but not this bullshit ambiguous, what do i do with that!, kind of vague commentary. Thanks, but i'll pass. concrete suggestions welcome.

every damn day.